I dream of a day where we don’t have to speak the names of Black people who have been taken from us too soon. I dream of a future where news headlines tell of how Black people overcame and reflect on lives long and well lived. For now, I hold on to the beauty that resides in our melanated skin and the unique voice that our people possess.
Months ago, I was privileged to converse with some colleagues and a mental health researcher, Dr. Olajide. In this particular conversation, Dr. Olajide facilitated a conversation about Kanye West and other celebrities that seem to garner intense reactions within our communities, most acutely from Black men. Although our conversation primarily centered around Kanye, I couldn’t […]
“Modern capitalism needs men who co-operate smoothly, and in large numbers; who want to consume more and more; and whose tastes are standardized and can be easily influenced and anticipated. It needs men who feel free and independent, not subject to any authority or principle or conscience—yet willing to be commanded, to do what is […]
No amount of perfectionism can stop our bodies from being hated or feared, though.
I know that those in my immediate circle of influence are probably sick of hearing me rave about how much I enjoyed the book Patriarchy Blues: Reflections on Manhood by Frederick Joseph. (By the way, if you sign up to have any type of relationship with me, no matter how close or casual, you will […]
“Are you sure, sweetheart, that you want to be well? Just so’s you’re sure, sweetheart, and ready to be healed, cause wholeness is no trifling matter. A lot of weight when you’re well.” Toni Cade Bambara I try to stay out of social media mess. Truly, I do. Social media can be so beautiful, bringing […]
“There was so much diverse black masculinity in the world of our childhood that it would have been impossible for any of us to have a one-dimensional understanding of black life. We knew from experience that some black males were kind and gentle, others cruel and indifferent, that some fathers were present, and some fathers […]
Days bleed together in a pandemic. We are still in the midst of one—aren’t we? Contrary to popular belief, and a world that seems to have just moved on with COVID, a pandemic grips us. Sickness has struck this globe in a way that will probably impact us for decades. As we come to grips […]
As I ease into the cool, black seat of the barber’s chair, I take a deep breath. For just one moment, I close my eyes and allow the tension and anxiety that are weighing so heavily upon my shoulders to ease. I look around the barbershop and smile. Snippets of conversations float to my ear […]
My formative years taught me that emotions were chaotic and wild. I learned that if I wanted to be a man, I needed to have a strong grip on things, to detach if necessary.
Good day everyone. There has been a lengthy break in my writing, but now I am back. I pray that you all are in good health and prospering in the ways that are meaningful to you. I must confess that sitting down to write something on Kevin Samuels, particularly after his death, feels strange. I […]
Brown skin, you know I love your Brown skin. I can’t tell where yours begins. I can’t tell where mine ends. -India Arie A new day begins Breathe The exhaustion of thousands of stressors pull me (us) in every direction. I have waited this long to explicitly think about my maleness out loud, to […]
It feels like yesterday (It just happened in March. What is time anymore?!) that we were minding our own business trying to navigate the ever-changing nature of this pandemic and people who didn’t want to wear their masks and…I digress…when social media lit up with a video from Kirk Franklin’s son, Kerrion Franklin. The video […]
“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” Alice Walker By now, I am sure you have heard that Naomi Osaka withdrew from the French Open [Please take some time to research her full background before coming to strong opinions on her…some of the loudest voices have […]
“Meditate and learn to be alone without being lonely…Learn to be quiet enough to hear the sound of the genuine within yourself so that you can hear it in other people…A few minutes every hour, a half-hour every day, a day a month, a week a year-in dedicated silence-is a goal to pursue.” Marian Wright […]