“You’ll be okay. You just have to learn that you’re worth more than settling on a weak man. If he can’t sweep you off your feet, what’s he worth? Not my sister’s time, I know that much.” My oldest younger brother was to be 21 that February. Hard to believe, but the chubby kid who […]
I’m getting married in 78 days. Most of the time, that reality hasn’t fully settled in on me. If you’d have asked me ten years ago what I hoped my future husband would be like, I would’ve laughed: nobody will want to marry me. Nobody could love this. You’re talking crazy talk! As my friendship […]
Houston, Texas, the fourth (soon to be third) largest city in U.S., recently became the most ethnically diverse city in our country. My hometown’s booming economy and cultural colorfulness have attracted quite a bit of attention over the past few years. Ever since I was younger, my dad has driven home the fact that our […]
“Oh, your dad’s a pastor?” he asked. “Is it a missionary Baptist church?” I smiled at the questioner, shaking my head. “No, it’s a Reformed Baptist church,” I told him. He grabbed a handful of materials from his booth at the conference we were both attending. “That’s great! We have lots of resources for pastor’s […]
Last summer, I went to a classical education conference in Moscow, Idaho. Now, many are unfamiliar with the city of Moscow, Idaho, but, for the purpose of this story, you should know that it probably has less black people in it than the natives of Moscow, Russia. And not only was I the only black […]
“How many kids are in your family?” I always brace myself for the shocked response to my reply: “There are nine of us.” I never feel the need to automatically clarify the gigantic age gap between me and the brother right below me (three years) and me and the brother after him (fourteen years), but, […]
I folded myself into the comfortable kitchen chair, legs dangling, head inclined towards my two chosen companions for the post-Memorial Day feast, the 85-year-old grandmother and her best friend. The two of them sat across from me, alternately talking in low tones to one another and turning to me. I alternately eavesdropped, pretending to listen to […]
In Chapter 4 of United, Trillia talks about how the Lord answered her prayers for relationships in an unexpected way. When she felt isolated in her predominately white church, God saw fit to send her two new friends; together, three three of them represented three different ethnicities, backgrounds, and experiences. These friendships were not a […]
I remember the first time my mom ever had my brother and I sit down and watch Eyes On The Prize during black history month. If I’m being honest, I felt a little corny piled onto her bed watching the old documentary. I knew about the Civil Rights movement, knew about my history. I didn’t […]
I grew up in predominately white congregations and classrooms before becoming a homeschooled foreigner living in Oxford, England when I was ten. I always felt and saw my differences, but I I liked my difference. I liked being black. I liked my history and my uniqueness among my peers. In fact, the first time another […]
“You don’t even act black.” In United Trillia shares that, as a teen, she was often labeled as “acting white.” Because of her intonation and diction, and the fact that she did well at school, her blackness was called into question. Though she was the daughter of two black parents who were passionate about racial […]
One of my favorite movies when I was a kid was Rogers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella. Not a recording of Julie Andrews on Broadway, guys, but the version with Brandy, Whitney Houston, and Whoopie Goldberg. The version where a black Cinderella falls in love with a Filipino prince who has a white father and none of […]
Revelation 5:19 talks about the great multitude of heaven, painting a beautiful tapestry of God’s creative work and his redemptive plan for panta ta ethne… every people group. Yet, as many of us look around our churches on Sunday morning, or our diner tables, most often, the variance of our tapestry is somewhat lacking. In […]
I remember the first time I ever realized that a story could center around somebody who looked like me. I was in fourth grade at a predominately white private school, and, during one of our trips to the library, I stumbled upon Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry. It came highly recommended by one of my […]
Pop threw up his hands in disgust, prompted by the third Valentine’s Day movie release advertisement that evening: “This is why young people can’t get married.” Obviously, it’s not Colin Farrell’s fault specifically (don’t ever change, you rakish Irishman). But as our conversation blossomed, I found myself agreeing that the insidious romantic promises carried in […]
I can’t read it without my heart picking up its pace, my ears pulsing with the swell of the applause I would have heard had I been standing there that day, amid the crowd of people on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial on August 28, 1963. I can’t read it without a pang as […]
The first thing you would probably notice about Joseph Solomon is that he’s tall. Really tall. At six foot, seven inches, he tends to stand out in a crowd. But, once you’re in a conversation with Joe, it’s his warmth and love of Christ that begins to stand out. And if you’ve spent any time […]
Several years ago, a friend of mine asked me for my opinion on a fiction manuscript. While I had many things to say about it, one of my comments stood out to me: “There was one thing I thought I’d mention, though there is really no need to address it. It’s a pet-peeve of mine, […]
I named my hair Wild Mike. And that’s what we call him, whether he’s been recently tamed by the flat iron or has just been washed and is jutting away from my head in all of its stubbornly-straight-yet-wildly-frizzy glory. Though I’d been bereft of the “kiddie perm” (a slightly milder version of the sodium hydroxide […]
Learn to love whether marriage is in view or not. “Look, I can testify about seeing something that isn’t there. You buy the off-brand crackerjacks and start chowing down with gusto, anxious for that prize. Halfway through, you realize they don’t taste just right, but you just keep eating. You’re sick before you realize the […]
